Self FIRST is NOT selfish. An empty vessel has nothing to offer, a frustrated countenance not only gives off frustrated responses or reactions but it also attracts more frustration. Ever notice that the flight attendant instructs you to secure your mask first (in the event of danger) before assisting others? Yes, you should top your list of priorities. When you are happy, financially stable, emotionally and mentally sound, etc you are not only in a better position to help others in all those areas but you inspire others to want to step up their own state of well being. .... This is especially true with more personal relationships, for eg. Parent/children relationship. When you are your best self as a parent you have so much more substantially to give to your children materially, mentally, emotionally, spiritually. You create a much more conducive environment for their growth and development. They are also modelling the qualities of your character and prove to be better at handling life's challenges as they grow up based on how they've seen you handle things, even when you think they aren't watching. The ripple effect of putting yourself first is real and big. So choose you and you choose the best for everyone else connected to you.